Bad Jokes | Part 4 (Short One-Liners)

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Guaranteed to Make You Say "Ugh" or "Aahh" at Least Once: Short, Bad Jokes

 Have you been picking your nose again?!
Why would I?! - I’ve had it since I was born!

I was down to my last 100 dollars. I really didn’t know what to do. So I asked myself the key question. What would Jesus do? And then I went and turned it into wine.
Funny fart joke
Toilet jokes? Nah, not my number one jokes, really.

But a good, solid number two!
What would happen if you threw blue sneakers into the Red Sea?
They would get wet.
A Chinese student is looking for an inexpensive room to rent. He finds one, but the owner warns him, “Yes, you can have the room. But we have a dog and two cats. I hope you like them.”
“No problem,” beams the student, “I’m happy to eat anything!”
Waiter, I am outraged. There is a hair in my soup.
And what do you expect for this price? A whole wig?!
Feeling amused? Explore our Puns section!
A moth visits a doctor, “Doctor please help me… I cut myself very badly 2 hours ago.”
The doctor takes a look and says, “Goodness me, that looks bad! Why didn’t you come earlier?”

The moth says, “I waited for the lights to turn on in your office …”

Why does it suck to be a penguin?
Because even when you get angry, you still look cute.
What has four legs, one foot and one head?
A bed.
“Our cat was stupid enough to drink some gasoline yesterday. She spent two hours racing through the flat, then just flopped on her back and was totally still. “
“Oh no, is she dead?”
“No, just ran out of gas”

At work:

Excuse me, may I disturb you shortly?
Of course, what is it?
Nothing, I just wanted to disturb you.
Online question:

What's the best way to solve my money problems?
Wrap yourself in a blanket and lay yourself on the porch of a millionaire family.
Next: Bad Jokes Part 5 (Terrible Humor)

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6  Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10

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