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Funny Sayings | Part 6 | Humorous and Crazy

The best first: Yes, the early bird catches the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
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Whenever four New Yorkers get into a cab together with no arguing, a bank has just been robbed.

My cactus died. Now it’s official. The desert takes better care of plants than I do.
Flies don't stand a chance, I'm a one man S.W.A.T. team.
You can hide from cake. But cake can’t hide from you.
Hard work pays off in the future. Lolling on the couch pays off right now.
Do you remember when I asked you to give me your opinion? That’s right, me neither.
Funny insult:

There are three kind of people. The first kind likes to take a shower. The second kind prefers a bath. And the third kind is like you.
If the grass is greener on the other side, fair bet is, the water bill is higher too.
Adding Insult to Injury Humor

My middle finger salutes you!
I’ll be there to catch you whenever you fall.

Love, the floor.

A bag of money can be a symbol not only of wealth, but also of tremendous inflation.
When you’re calling a woman, you need to call her twice. First time to give her a chance to find the phone in her handbag, the second time for her to actually answer.
Alcohol does not solve any problems, but then again, neither does milk.
My wallet is like an onion. Opening it makes me cry.
Always be yourself. Unless you can also be a unicorn. In that case, always be a unicorn.
He who laughs last is a bit of a slow thinker.
Some people's x-rays actually look much better than their photographs.
Of course I can keep secrets. But the people I tell them to obviously can't.
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