As of 2017, Mexico introduced a new subject into their PE curriculum
– pole vault.
Q: It is not those who lack it, but those who have too much of it, that
will try to steal it from you. What is it?
A: Time.
A Michigan scientist claimed that all these years, he’d been trying and
trying to develop a cancer cure.
Somehow, it just always ended up as meth.
Do you think that when Han Solo married Princess
Leia, she demanded that he change his name to Han Married?
A superconductor comes into a bar.
“Hey!” says the barkeep, “we don’t serve
superconductors!”
The superconductor didn’t put up any resistance.
Last words of a Jedi apprentice, “Of course I
know which side the light saber comes out!”
Why did Thor lose his power of lightning as a
teenager?
-
Because he got grounded.
Do you know what Hercules’ wife is called?
Why, Fraucules, of course.
Chuck Norris can talk about the Fight Club.
Considering that most people get buried in suits, any zombie apocalypse
is likely to be a rather formal affair.
Two ex-classmates are meeting over coffee two years after graduating from
the university. One of them takes a sip and sighs, “Man, whenever it dawns
on me that I’m actually a certified engineer, I get too scared to ever go to
a doctor…”
Captain America is my role model.
But I don’t think I could ever make
it beyond Lieutenant East Texas.
What did one orphan say to another?
“Oh just go get the
Batmobile, will you Robin.”
A Michigan scientist claimed that all these years, he’d been trying and
trying to develop a cancer cure.
Somehow, it just always ended up as meth.
Mrs. Fire was Robin Williams’ best movie, without a Doubt!
As of 2017, Mexico introduced a new subject into their PE curriculum – pole
vault.
What is the difference between a woman and Batman?
-
Batman
knows every night what he’s going to wear.
Every evening I assure myself that 5 hours of sleep is more than enough for
a healthy, non-wuss adult.
Every morning, I could punch myself
in the face for that.
My friend wrote a book on poltergeists, it’s simply flying off the shelves.
A chemist walks into a pharmacy and says, “Do you have
acetylsalicylic acid, please?”
“You mean aspirin?” wonders the
pharmacist.
“Ah yeah, aspirin, I can never remember that name!”
Fastest things on Earth:
1) Maglev train
2) Internet in
Silicon Valley
3) Those 5 minutes between hitting
snooze and the alarm starting again.
Smart Jokes - Part 1 |
Part 2 |
Part 3 |
Part 4 |
Part 5 |
Part 6
|
Part 7 |
Part 8
