It is not those who lack it, but those who have too much of it,
that will try to steal it from you. What is it? - Answer: Time.
Any mushroom can be eaten. The trick is to find those mushrooms that can be
eaten more than once.
Now that he’s dead, everyone pretends they were soooo into Stephen
I bet you they couldn’t even name five of his songs if
you asked them.
A public swimming pool.
Or, as I like to call it, homeopathic
What’s a cure for anorexia?
Pshah, it’s a piece of cake.
Chuck Norris rewrote the periodic table.
He added the element of surprise.
Do you have a cat? And are you not a fan of house chores? -
Here’s a little tip: Make your cat full of static electricity by rubbing her
with a balloon and then use a laser pointer to have her go on all your dusty
shelves and surfaces. - There you go, dusting is a chore of yesterday.
A German driver was pulled over on a Polish highway by the local police.
Polish policeman: "What’s your name, sir?"
Policeman: "OK. Age?"
Helmut: "Oh no, I’m only visiting."
Worst way to comfort a grammar Nazi? - They’re, their.
I tried to cross-breed cows and hyenas for my PhD thesis. Not such a
great idea, the result was a laughing stock for the whole university.
The adjective of quiz is quizzical, right?