Two clairvoyants meet. One says to the other: “You are fine, and how am
I?
Two days ago, my friend Peter ran off with my wife.”
“Oh no, how long have you been friends?”
“Since two days ago.”
That awkward moment when you’re trying to have small
talk with your driving instructor and you ask him what he does for a
living.
Teacher: "OK class, who will give me the chemical
formula for water?"
Pupil: "HIJKLMNO."
Teacher: "What on earth are you on about?"
Pupil: "Well you said yourself yesterday it was H to O!"
What a difference a good shower makes!
I was irritable, exhausted and I felt like hell.
Now I’m irritable, exhausted, I feel like hell and I smell of
grapefruit!
Daddy reads some bedtime stories to make little
Jonny fall asleep.
Half an hour later mommy opens the door quietly and asks: “And, is he
asleep?”
Little Jonny answers: “Yes, finally.”
An employee complains to his boss, “Sorry boss, but
the salary doesn’t even remotely match the effort I put into my work.”
Boss nods, “I know, but we can’t let you starve to death.”
What should you do when you see a spaceman?
You just park in it, man.
First Part
Clean Jokes
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Part 3 |
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Part 5
