Part 1 | Part 2 A man sees a shooting star.
“Oh, how nice! I can make a wish! I want a woman who knows what she
The shooting star pauses briefly, then turns around.
What do you call a fly without wings?
How do you tell you’ve had two dinosaurs in the
There are footprints in the butter.
Two tomatoes are walking across a street. One of them gets run over by a
The first tomato looks at the gruesome scene and says: “Well, life’s not
a petting zoo.”
Two milk cartons are sitting on a roof. Suddenly one
milk carton throws the other down and says, “That’s what you get.”
How can you tell you have an elephant in your
By the big "E" on his pajamas.
What is small, grey and triangular?
The shadow of the green triangle!
Do unzipped files get embarrassed?
A gummy bear sits on a power line and says to the
other gummy bear, "brzzztbrzzztbbbbrzzztbrrrrzt"
What does a farmer say when he's looking for his
"Where is my tractor?"
At a farmer’s market stall:
Customer: Excuse me, is this tomato genetically modified?
Seller: Why do you want to know?
Tomato: Yeah, why do you want to know?
Two skyscrapers are sitting in the cellar, knitting
Is there anything odd about this?
Of course – you can only crochet gasoline!
Q: What is blue and smells like red paint?
A: Blue paint.
What is yellow and cannot swim?
Because it only has one arm.
How many elephants fit into a submarine?
Twelve, because the doorbell is on the left side.
Two sheep are sitting in a rubber boat in the middle
of the ocean. A nothing floats along and passes by the boat.
One sheep remarks, “Did you see that?”
The other one says, “No…”
First sheep agrees, “Me neither.”
What does a skeleton say when he enters a bar?
Well - nothing, really.
A man goes with his daughter in a forest. “Look a
mushroom!” points the dad.
The mushroom turns around and says, “So what?!”
Two walls meet at the corner.
Next Part 2
Best Anti Jokes