Contact Privacy
 

New Dad Jokes 2018 | 2019

The best first: What is yellow and kills you if you get it in the eyes?
-
A school bus.
    
 New Dad jokes

Fresh Dad Jokes

 
What is black, cool, and stands in a forest?
-
A deer in a leather jacket.
Why has no skeleton ever jumped from a really tall building?
-
They ain’t got the balls.

Why don’t fish play basketball?
-
They have issues with the net.
I can only handle 25 letters of the alphabet. I don't know why (y).
What does a traffic warden do when he wins a million dollars in the lottery?
-
He buys himself a crossing and becomes self-employed.
What do you give a pig when it’s poorly? A good oink-ment!
Save the forests!!
-
Eat more beavers!!!
I met Bruce Lee’s vegetarian brother today.
 
His name is Brocko Lee.
Why can’t fish cry?
-
Because they don’t have eyebrows.

Fish Joke
What is white, stands in front of the stairs, and can’t go up?
-
A washing machine.

What do polar bears eat for breakfast? Frosted flakes.
Why are the North Koreans the best at geometry?
 
Because they’ve got a Supreme Ruler.
Why didn’t the toilet paper make it across the road?
 
He met with too many cracks on the way.
What tea is it not a good idea to drink?
-
TNT.
What happened on the 1.1.1111?
-
A new year started.
Why is it pointless to play hide and seek with mountain ranges?
-
They peak.
What is yellow and kills you if you get it in the eyes?
-
A school bus.
A man goes to the doctor and says: “Doctor I swallowed a key. Can you please get it out of my belly?”
-
The doctor asks: “When did you swallow it?”
-
“About 3 years ago.”
-
“Really? Why are you coming this late?!”
-
“Well… I lost my spare key.”
An exclamation mark look at a question mark appraisingly, “Hmmm, nice curves!

Dad Joke new
”What did Jasmin rice say to Asian vegetables?
-
Don't you wok away from me!
What brand of car does an Egg drive?
_
A Yolkswagen
What would you call a camel that has no hump?
-
Humphrey.
What’s the difference between a wasp and a fly?
-
A wasp can fly, but a fly can’t wasp.
Why is there a donut sitting at the dentist’s office?
-
It’s there to get a filling.
What kind of cake is the most popular one in cake shops?
Answer: “This one!“

And the second most popular?
Answer: “No, no – that one, right next to it!”

What is black and white and sits on a swing?
-
A swinguine.
Why do fish make such lousy tennis players?
-
They’re afraid of coming close to the net.
What is white and hides behind a tree?
-
A shy milk.
Are insecticides good for mosquitos?"
[yes]
Not at all, it kills them!"
“What to call a bear who’s lost all its teeth?
-
A gummy bear!”


Dad Jokes

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | New Dad Jokes

See also: Bad Jokes



 
 Do you know a good joke?
Please submit it here:



Security question:
What do you see on the pictrues?






 
UP to the top of the page
 
Press Ctrl + D on your keyboard (Mac: Command + D) to add short-funny.com to your bookmarks.

© Copyright Short-Funny.com