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Very Good Chuck Norris Jokes | Part 9

The best first: Chuck Norris hasn't filled his gas tank in decades. His car drives on respect.
Chuck Norris only farts to kill.

Chuck Noris died... but he's already feeling a lot better!
Fear of Friday 13th is called friggatriskaidekaphobia. Fear of clowns is called coulrophobia. Fear of Chuck Norris is called common sense.
Chuck Norris donates blood every month. Just not his own.
There are 156 things in a room Chuck Norris could kill you with, the room itself included.
Chuck Norris can blow bubbles with well-done beef steaks.
 Smurfs Joke

Chuck Norris doesn’t bother with sunscreen. If he’s had enough tan, he just looks at the Sun and says, “No!”
In the Star Wars they always say “May the Force be with you.” They actually mean Chuck Norris.

True Chuck Norris facts:

Chuck Norris was born in 1940 but he looks at least 20 years younger.
He is said to have some Cherokee roots.
Chuck Norris wanted to become a police officer.
His real name is Carlos Ray Norris Jr.
He got his nick name "Chuck" from a friend in the military during his time in Korea.
He was world champion in Karate.
Chuck Norris has 5 kids.
Chuck Norris did a roundhouse kick in every martial arts movie he made.
He has a black belt in Tang Soo Do (10th degree) and black belt in Tae Kwon Do (8th degree). He was also the first Westerner in the history of Tae Kwon Do to have earned the 8th degree black belt.
In younger days his favorite actor was John Wayne.
His favorite joke is "Before the Boogie Man goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris".
First Part
of the best Chuck Norris jokes

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9

See also: New jokes


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