New Blonde Jokes 2022

New Blonde Jokes 2021 / 2022!

Two blondes are chatting, “Look what they’re writing here in the newspaper. The Chinese government wants to send 2 exploring satellites to the Sun's orbit. I wonder, isn’t it too hot there?”

The other blonde sighs: “No, they’ll only fly at night.”

“Now I know why I gained weight!“
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Anna, 24, blonde – throws her volumizing shampoo in the trash.

A blonde girl is saying goodbye to her boyfriend at the airport, she’s flying off to Paris. “Just don’t forget that it’s 9 hours more than here at LA when you call me darling, OK?”

“Yeah, I will,” sighs the blonde, “but I think it will take a while getting used to having 33-hour days…”

Teacher announces to the class: “Your math test was really bad. 32% of you got an F.”

Blonde Chloe shouts in outrage: “Ha, that can’t be right. There’s not even that many of us in the class!”

A blonde woman wants to cross the street but falls into an open manhole despite the warnings that have been put around it.

Another blonde woman tries to cross the street but also falls into the same manhole.

Then a third, fourth, fifth, sixth, seventh and eighth.

All those blondes tried to cross the street but fell into the manhole.

Then a ninth blonde tried to cross the street – and succeeded. How could that happen?

Answer: The manhole was full. She could step on the head of one of the previous blondes.

Why are blondes discouraged from tapping on their forehead?

Nobody knows what the echo could do to their hearing system.

A blonde girl at a train station asks the conductor, “Excuse me, will this train take me to Seattle?”

“No, Miss, I’m afraid not,” the conductor shakes his head and is about to continue, when another blonde peeks from behind her and asks, “And me?”

Santa Claus, a blonde with an IQ over 100 and a normal blonde are walking along the street. Suddenly they see a 100 dollar bill lying on the street. Who will pick it up first?

Answer: Nobody. Santa Clause doesn’t really exist, nor does a blonde with an IQ over 100. And the normal blonde thinks the bill is a run-over frog.

Why would blondes survive a possible zombie apocalypse?
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You know the zombie chant, don’t you? “Brains!!!”

A blonde police officer stops a car. In the car sits a blonde woman. The police officer asks for her driving license. The blonde woman is a bit puzzled and asks what a driving license is?

The blonde officer explains that it is the little thing with her picture on it.

The blonde woman roots through her handbag and fishes out her little cosmetic mirror. She hands it to the blonde police officer. The officer looks at it and says: Oh I’m sorry ma’am – I didn’t know you were also with the force. Please, drive on. “