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Easy Jokes for Kids | Part 4

The best first: I’m a pro at sleeping. I could do it with my eyes closed.
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Easy Jokes for Kids
The teacher is asking the children what is their favorite instrument.
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Little Johnny replies: The school bell.
 Two neighbors are chatting and one says, “You know, Jim, you have such a teeny, tiny dog. Why the heck do you have a sign saying ‘Beware of the dog’?”

Jim says, “Basically I don’t want anybody to stumble over him.”
Two boys are walking outside and one of them finds a hundred dollar bill.
 
His friend suggests that they should take it to the lost-and-found office.
 
The boy replies: “No point. This is my mom’s money.”
 
His friend is startled, “But how can you know that?”
 
“Because my father keeps saying that my mother is just throwing money out the window.”
Little Johnny, why on Earth did you cover your pillow with honey?!
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I wanted to have sweet dreams.
Little Kenny is about to have a big test and his father says: “You better study real good boy, ‘cause if you don’t pass that test, you can forget that you’re my son!”

The next day Kenny comes home and his dad asks him how he did in the test.

Kenny looks at him and says, “And who are you, dude?”
Three guys are stranded in a desert. By a stroke of luck, they find a magic genie lamp.

 The genie grants each of them one wish.

The first guy wishes to be back home. Wish granted.

The second guy wishes the same. Wish granted.

The third guy says, "It feels very lonely here now, I wish my friends were with me…” Wish granted.
Dad on the last day of school: So, where’s your school report, my boy?

Tom: Sorry, I’ll bring it a day later.

Dad: Why?

Tom: I borrowed it to Kevin because he wanted to scare his parents.
A teacher shows Little Johnny a butterfly and asks, “Well, Johnny, what do we call this butterfly?”

Little Johnny says, “That’s a peacock butterfly.”

“Come on, Johnny, peacock butterflies aren’t green!”

“Well maybe this one isn’t ripe yet?”
What do teachers and clouds have in common?

Everything brightens up when they go away.
If you can't decide between running and eating chocolate, run to the store for some chocolate.
A priest falls into water and soon starts to drown. But his faith in God is strong and he knows God will save him.

A small boat rows to him and offers help. “No! God will help me, thank you!” gasps the priest and continues drowning.

 A second, bigger boat comes by soon and tries to get the man out of the water. “No!” fights the priest. “God alone will save me!” The boat leaves and the priest finally drowns.

In heaven, he feels quite betrayed and goes to ask God about it.

 “Well, you moron,” thunders the Lord, “and who do you think sent all those ships?!”
Next is PART 5
 of our English kids jokes!

Kids Jokes - Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 
See also: Cute Jokes| Clean Jokes


 





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