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Geek Jokes | Part 5

The best first: Some people see “Buy two beers, get three!”
I see “Buy eight beers, get twelve!”

Mr. and Mrs. Blane are going to the theater. They’re waiting at the cashdesk and finally there’s only one couple in front of them. The man says to the cashier, “Tristan and Isolde. Two tickets, please.”
Mr. Blane waits his turn and says to the cashier, “Harlan and m’lovely wife. Two tickets also, please.”

What’s the difference between a regular guy and an IT guy?

A regular guy thinks kilobyte is 1000 bytes.

A programmer thinks a kilometer is 1024 meters.

Two friends meet after a while, one says to the other, “Man, I heard you got married! Congratulations, you must be a really happy man!”

“Yes,” replies the other, “I must.”
 Three statistical mathematicians go hunting deer. They finally track down a beautiful one, but the first mathematician shoots two feet to the left. The other mathematician misses him by two feet to the right.

The third mathematician high fives the two and yells, “Yeah! We got him on average!”
The only reason Chuck Norris didn’t receive an Oscar yet is that no civilian is courageous enough to hand him a blunt metal instrument.
Mr. Billingford files for a divorce, he cites the fact that his wife hasn’t spoken to him in the past half a year as a reason.

“Are you sure you want to divorce, Mr. Billingford?” double checks the judge, “where are you going to find another woman like that?”

My horrible neighbor would never reveal her true age. But there are some subtle clues, for instance she has a miniature from Vincent Van Gogh instead of a photo in her passport, and a signed copy of the Bible.
Two boys are talking about WWII:

“My grandpa made it through a concentration camp!”

“So did mine. But he didn’t last through the Nuremberg Trials.”

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Best Geek Jokes

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7

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