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Funny Dad Jokes | Part 3

Best first: What is red and goes up and down? A tomato in an elevator.

What do you call a sheep without legs?

A cloud.
Do you know the story about the chicken that crossed the border? Me neither, I couldn’t follow it.

Did you know that UPS and Fedex are going into a merger? They will be called Fed-Ups now.
Dad: I love my rock-hard, honed six-pack so much I protect it with a good layer of lard."
"Dad you look tired."

"Oh, you mean the dark circles under my eyes? Those are the shadows of my great deeds."
My dad’s typical compliment to when I’ve done something good – Wow, you’re a fart smella! I mean you are a smart fella!”
Two balloons fly through the desert. One yells at the other, “Be careful there is a pffffftttt”

I wanted to wear my camouflage jeans today but I just couldn’t find them.
Dad - Could you call me a taxi, please?
As you wish, dear taxi.
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of Dad Jokes

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | New Dad Jokes

See also: Bad Jokes

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