Two walls arrange a date – “I’ll meet you at the corner.”
“Dad, can you make me a sandwich, please?”
Dad: “Abrakadabra, you
are now a sandwich!”
The phone rings.
Dad: What does the caller ID say?
Dad: Don't answer that. We only pick up for ranks
Lieutenant Caller and higher.
We only had 4 candles for my cake when I turned 15. My Dad said:
“It’s fine. We’ll use them. It is 4 your birthday, anyway.”
“Daddy, what is an alcoholic?”
“Do you see those 4 trees, son? An
alcoholic would see 8 trees.”
“Um, Dad - there are only 2 trees.”
"What is a bunny without a carrot?"
“Dad, can you call mom’s phone? She can’t find it.”
“Absolutely! ‘Mom’s phone! Mom’s phone!’”
Did you hear about the new movie constipation? It hasn’t come out yet.
I told my dad that he should embrace his mistakes. He had tears in his
eyes. Then he hugged my sister and me.
of Dad Jokes
See also: Bad Jokes