A blonde hits another car. The other driver goes berserk and
yells, "Did you even do a driving test you stupid cow?"
replies with dignity, "Yes, and probably a lot more times than you did!"
Q: Why don't blondes double the amounts in recipes when
cooking for more people?
A: The oven usually doesn't go to 700
A blonde girl calls her boyfriend at work, "Darling, I'm doing this
jigsaw puzzle but I just can't figure it out. All the pieces look the same."
"And do you have the picture of what it's supposed to look like in the end?"
"Yes, there is a red rooster on the box. But it just doesn't seem to work
"Well don't worry about it, we'll look at it in the evening
When he comes home in the evening, the blonde shows him
the puzzle. After a long silence, he says, "Alright, now we'll just put
those cornflakes back and not mention it again."
girl borrows a DVD from her friend. A week later she brings it back all
The friend gets mad and wants to know what the heck
happened! “Well, nothing, really,” replies the blonde girl, “I just
underlined all my favorite bits!”
What did the blonde get
on his IQ test?
Why don't blondes get sick
Viruses and bacteria also have their pride!
A blonde: Now I know why I’m so fat. My shampoo bottle says “Adds
fullness and volume”!
Q: A blonde flies with you to London
on a plane; how can you steal her window seat?
A: Tell her that the
seats going to London are all in the middle row.
suffer from headaches? No. Why not?
No brain, no pain!
Why are blonde girls' watches so often wet from licking?
Because the blondes know their facts: a Tic Tac has only 1½ calories!
of Blonde Jokes
New Blonde Jokes
* A small note: It is very much NOT OK to use blonde jokes, even
the very funny ones, to make actual people feel bad. That's a
game nobody really wins, and even when people laugh with you at
the time, it will never get you any real respect.
Everything you send out will have an influence on you, so you'd
best send out something positive. And while at it, why not enjoy
these mean and ridiculously funny jokes, for academic purposes!