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Pun Jokes | Part 4

Best first: Why don’t teddy bears ever really eat at their picnics? - Because they’re already stuffed.

     
Two egotists started a fight. It was an I for an I.

I don’t want to cut my hair! I’m really attached to it!
Notice on a shoe repair shop:
 
I’ll heel you, I’ll save your sole, I’ll even gladly dye for you.
A man in a butcher shop: "I would like bull testicles please."
-
Butcher: "Me too."
I was trying to catch some fog earlier but I mist.
Toilet paper plays an important role in my life.
Why did the octopus blush?
 
He’d just seen the bottom of the ocean!!!!
Why does Peter Pan fly all the time?
-
He Neverlands.
Why are programmers no fans of the outdoors?
-
There are too many bugs.
I’d love to know how the Earth rotates. It would totally make my day.
Why is the math book so sad?
-
It's got too many problems!
Have you heard about this dude who had to have his left leg and left arm amputated after a car crash? -- He's all right now.“
Nurse to a doctor: Doctor, here’s your list of heart, liver and kidney donors. I already sorted them alphabetically.
-
Doctor: Excellent job. Seriously well organ-ized.
Doctor: You're obese.

Patient: For that I definitely want a second opinion.

Doctor: You’re quite ugly, too.
Do you think that when Han Solo married Princess Leia, she demanded that he change his name to Han Married?
How do you organize a fantastic space party? You planet.
Why was the tomato all red?
 
It saw the salad dressing.

What would you call a fish with a missing eye?

A fsh, probably.


I wanted to tell you a joke about leeches. But I won’t – they all suck.
Next Part
of Best Puns

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | New Puns



 
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